Pages.

sing_song_girl @ 2009-02-18T15:59:00

2009-02-18T21:33:09Z

Comment to this post and I will give you 5 subjects/things I associate you with. Then post this in your LJ and elaborate on the subjects given.

my subjects from leaute

books: I've had tons of books since before I can even remember and my parents always read to me on request (usually it was Alice for the very young). My family just always read books, they were always around. Stacks of readers digest, the encyclopedia, hand me down novels and I suppose some of it was just to fend of boredom from growing up in the middle of nowhere. As I got older it just stayed with me, I was disinterested a lot in school so I would often hide books in my desk and finish a children's novel before the day was out instead of paying attention to the lesson. I also just love words, sometimes an author can write a sentence and there is an intense moment of understanding between the reader and writer, it may only happen once or twice in an entire book but when it does occur it's touching, as if someone knows exactly what you're feeling. I have to admit I haven't finished a book since last july or august but I enjoy just being surrounded by books, I like the way they feel in my hand, the smell of a good old one. I'd sleep on top of all them if I could.

utena: Utena was found by accident. I was with an old friend of mine (a friend I had a crush on in high school), she was really into Sailor Moon and we went to the video store where she found a VHS of Utena and we rented it. Awkwardness unused because of the girl/girl subject manner but watching it with her has become a sentimental memory. Since seeing the whole series I love it so much because of the theme, that girls, women need to become their own princes, no one can save you but yourself. It's also really fucking weird, I dig that too.

fashion: Life is just a big game of dress-up to me. My mother is a great seamstress and since I was a little girl she made me dresses. My love for period pieces come from my mother as well, we would often watch movies like Gone With the Wind just to see the costumes. I was born in the wrong time, I want hats, gloves, skirts and pearls so a lot of my interest in fashion is finding a way to bring dress-up into an everyday world. Really I just never grew up, I'm still that four-year-old prancing in front of the mirror in her grand-mothers costume jewelry.

writing: I spent so much time ripping up things I had written, I thought it sucked, which it did but I didn't understand that even the best had to work their way up. Because I wasted so much time my writing is at a high school level, although it has improved in the last couple years. I write for me, I dont intend to ever get published or write the next great american novel. I do it because you feel like you have to, you just have to get it out. At the core I consider myself a diarist, it's what I pay the most attention to and where I write the most openly but I do attempt poems, short stories and there's a teleplay in there somewhere. It's awful but I love my characters, they're awesome.

'Don't go to bed. Nobody's allowed to go to bed tonight!': I stay up insanely late (last night I was up until four) and I love to talk, talk about everything and anything so when people are drinking and partying you always hit this point at like 2am where you have these great, deep, interesting conversations and I live for that, literally it's my meaning in life just talking. So I just never want it to be over (even though, if you've noticed once 5am rolls around I'm often the first to say their going to bed).

also got a new layout, banner really.

like scenes from VC Andrews.

2009-02-10T20:39:46Z

I don't know how I ended up at the jack robinson archive but while there I discovered a series of photographs featuring gloria vanderbilt and her sons carter and anderson cooper. I've always had an interest in the Vanderbilt's, a filthy rich american family rocked by tragedy and court room scandal and we can't forget the fact that a certain nightly news caster was a product of this blood line. I had originally saved these images for mcollinknight, she harbors a sweet admiration for Mr. Cooper but when i took a closer look I started to wonder if I was seeing a family lead by a distant mother and father who never fully understood their children.

but maybe it just took some time to feel natural in front of the camera.

an earlier shoot, our future anchor man is on the left.

i got an umbrella.

But then again they are just photographs taken in an abhorrently decorated home. A picture may be worth a thousand words but no one can ever understand a family dynamic unless you are a member, stories are merely created by curious onlookers.

Interestingly enough Diane Arbus also photographed

searching

2009-02-09T03:41:12Z

I wondering if anyone can help me out. What I'm looking for is a website that sends out e-mail alerts for astrological events. Events like local meteor showers, when Venus come closest to the moon, you know the shit Jack Horkheimer "The Stargazer" tells you about on PBS (what a name, Horkheimer).

Any ideas?

because I haven't done one of these in a while.

2009-01-17T00:42:24Z

The "baby it's cold outside" edition:

picture blogs (it's all the rage);
if charlie parker were a gunslinger - my personal favorite.

sugar and spice - sexy ladies of the 60's and 70's.

this isn't happiness - amazing images, tumblr at it's best.

retrozone - as the title suggests, retro images. NSFW.

english russia - just because something cool happens daily on 1/6 of the earths surface.

book in mouth disease - old school book covers.

cars;
hot wheels - from the creator of this isn't happiness.

art fitzpatrick's portrait of cars - classic car illustrations. pontiac, buick and others.

another road trip - a serious classic gm collection.

everything else;
it's not you, it's your books - yeah, books are a deal breaker.

star wars - retold by someone who hasn't seen it.

pan;
secret service code names - renegade is a pretty bad ass choice.

doomsday clock - we're five minutes to midnight.

update

2009-01-09T21:13:15Z

new layout on maetel.hookshot.net. I had started off wanting to do a complete overhaul of plastered but I got distracted and I cant seem to find the right image for my layout section anyway, it's kinda frustrating.
It's the bomb bitches!

eve

2009-01-01T04:51:32Z

I took a deep breath and read the all of my old live journal entries. Perhaps I'm nostalgic or maybe I'm continuing my search from last night, going through all my paper journals looking for answers, looking for some explanation of why I've started down and continue perusing such a self-destructive path. I’ve found none, expect my written admission that I must enjoy it.
It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, I should start giving myself more credit as a writer but what I found the most interesting is what a time capsule it has all become. Inside jokes, plans made but that never came to fruition and old photos I had forgotten about. I miss the way our small group of friends would comment on each others entries, little play fights and a certain touchy someone freaking out whenever we used his real name on the internet. I should start using it more because I realized what I had been telling myself all along is true, that its just another medium to write in, who cares what others think. My voice is different here than it is in my paper journals, a bit more direct and controlled not just the romantic musings of how I love a boys hipbones, or the way the air felt different underneath his window.
In going through all the older entries I also noticed how connected to my friends I was. I would often thank you all for being there for me, for listening to my problems for being so non-judgmental and understanding. I’ve grown distant this year, or maybe I’ve been distant since retuning from Seattle, I don’t know.
But I have to say this year has been a year like no other. It was a blur, spent under the effects of alcohol (mostly) and infatuation. I’ve spent it in a permanent state of limerance and limerance is a dangerous place to be. Although my affairs with the douche bag have mostly concluded in, “What the fuck am I doing with my life?” I have to thank him. He gave me a quiet confidence, a chance to do things I never thought I’d be able to, and a subtle strut in my step. He also gave me stories. Stories upon stories shared while smoking too many cigarettes, too early in the morning. I miss who he used to be. But “Pleasant Living” got shelved. With our last ill-fated connection Robin and David seem tarnished, their friendship marred and I’ll need months, perhaps years before I can return to the creation of their lives. To All Things Must Pass (on vinyl), midnight snacks, and run down camaros.
But this year contained more than him. Reconnecting with old friends from high school, staying up late growing punchy, growing philosophical. Trying to examine each others lives since they make so little sense to ourselves. It isn’t always easy but they make it better.
I’ve grown reflective not just of this year but of the last five or so. Everything contained in the time of Pennsylvania, Washington, Chelwynd and here in Lansdowne, the house I grew up in but never really “home”. After it all I have to ask myself, What am I really looking for? Since, it seems, I’ve found nothing.
So what’s my new years resolution? I don’t really make them but this year I think I’d like to try being more open, stop telling myself I don’t have the right to feel things. I’d like to try being less private, being more open to the world around me, not giving a fuck what the rest of you think. I think I’ll try to write in live journal more and leaving my entries unlocked not only as a way to bring myself out more but as a way to bring my writing out more. I think I would like to be less shy.
5...4...3...2...1
Happy New Year!

wishes for 2009.

2008-12-31T06:17:17Z

I wish the big three survive and create modern counterparts to the ancient muscle machines. That the hum, the purr of a future American car can still cause my pulse to quicken and knees to shake. I wish we could all turn of our televisions and explore the parks and woods right down the street from us, put on a pair of creek shoes and wade in streams picking up odd pebbles and chasing after water spiders. I wish the fireflies would return to the suburbs. Girls would catch them in mason jars, mischievous boys would rip off their lighted ends and place them on each fingernail. I wish newspapers would never stop their presses and more of us would spend Sundays with ink stains on our fingers. I wish antique stores would not be pushed out of business by Internet giants and we could all be struck by a curiosity to sift through their shelves, flipping through old polaroids of unknown families that somehow mirror so much of our own. To try on costume jewelry that reminds us of our Grandmother's. Open up a good old book with worn covers, browned page edges; open it up and inhale that unique scent only acquired by time and devotion. I wish for an explosion of art; of painting, writing and film. Allow the creators, the artists to take center stage instead of Paris Hilton, Kasey Anthony or whoever is the center of the latest 24-hour news cycle scandal. I wish politics would become more of what we idealized, representatives of US who listen to each others ideas and do what is best for the country, not themselves. I wish Barack Obama can make all his promises come true. I wish we could all try to do our parts to help him, do our part in creating a truly new and good America, carrying ourselves one step closer to the world we've all imagined. I wish we could all find what we're looking for and when we do it makes us feel fulfilled and happy.

So I just wish you could come out and play for a while. There's a great big world out here and sometimes it can be really beautiful.

this is how my mind works...

2008-09-23T00:01:29Z

image heavy under the cut...

megan fox

sean connery

cary grant

marilyn, it's nice to see you smile.

john mccain

janis joplin

monroe and capote

edna st vincent millay

jack nicholson and angelica houston

kirin beer ad

charlie chaplin

marisa berenson

jane seymour

perrier poster girl

to tame

2008-09-01T23:31:55Z

I'm almost done cleaning out my room. All thats left is whats under the bed. It's strange the things I've found hidden around my room. Wanting to forget but not quite ready to throw away; old love letters, cherry tic-tacs, and a quote in a old journal from pennsylvania that says:
"one runs the risk of weeping a little, if one lets himself be tamed." - the little prince. This scribbled quote led me to the comfort of re-reading the entire exchange with the fox from this beautiful little book and I understand it now in a way I never have before.

it was then that the fox appeared.
"good morning" said the fox.

"good morning"
the little prince responded politely
although when he turned around he saw nothing.

"I am right here" the voice said, "under the apple
tree."

"who are you?" asked the little prince, and added,

"You are very pretty to look at."

"I am a fox", the fox said.

"Come and play with me,"
proposed the little prince, "I am so unhappy."

"I cannot play with you," the fox said,
"I am not tamed."

"AH please excuse me,"said the little prince.
But after some thought, he added:
"what does that mean---'tame'?"

"you do not live here," said the fox,
"what is it you are looking for?"

"I am looking for men," said the little prince.
"What does that mean---tame?"

"Men,"said the fox,
"they have guns, and they hunt.
It is very disturbing.
They also raise chickens.
These are their only interests.
Are you looking for chickens?"

"No," said the little prince.
"I am looking for friends.
What does that mean---tame?"

"It is an act too often neglected,"
said the fox.
"It means to establish ties."

"To establish ties?"

"Just that," said the fox.
"to me, you are still nothing more than
a little boy who is just like
a hundred thousand other little boys.
And I have no need of you.
And you, on your part, have no need of me.
To you I am nothing more
than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes.
But if you tame me, then we shall need each other.
To me, you will be unique in all the world.
To you, I shall be unique in all the world. . ."

"I am beginning to understand,"
said the little prince.

"There is a flower. . .I think she has tamed me. . ."

"It is possible," said the fox.

"On earth one sees all sorts of things."

"Oh but this is not on the earth!"
said the little prince.

The fox seemed perplexed, and very curious.
"On another planet?"

"Yes"

"Are there hunters on that planet?"

"No"

"Ah that's interesting! Are there chickens?"

"No"

"Nothing is perfect," sighed the fox.
But he came back to his idea.
"My life is very monotonous," he said.
"I hunt chickens; men hunt me.
All chickens are just alike,
and all the men are just alike.
And in consequence, I am a little bored.
But if you tame me,
it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life.
I shall know the sound of a step that will be
different from all the others.
Other steps send me hurrying back
underneath the ground.
Yours will call me, like music out of my burrow.
And then look:
you see the grain-fields down yonder?
I do not eat bread.
Wheat is of no use to me.
The wheat fields have nothing to say to me.
And that is sad.
But you have hair that is the color of gold.
Think how wonderful that will be
when you have tamed me!
The grain, which is also golden,
will bring me back the thought of you.
And I shall love to listen
to the wind in the wheat. . ."

The fox gazed at the little prince,
for a long time.
"Please---tame me!" he said.

"I want to, very much," the little prince replied.
"But I have not much time.
I have friends to discover,
and a great many things to understand."

"One only understands the things that one tames,"
said the fox.
" Men have no more time to understand anything.
They buy things all ready made at the shops.
But there is no shop anywhere
where one can buy friendship,
and so men have no friends any more.
If you want a friend, tame me. . ."

"What must I do, to tame you?
asked the little prince.

"You must be very patient," replied the fox.
First you will sit down
at a little distance from me
-like that-in the grass.
I shall look at you out of the corner of my eye,
and you will say nothing.
Words are the source of misunderstandings.
But you will sit a little closer to me,
every day..."

The next day the little prince came back.

"It would have been better to come back
at the same hour," said the fox.
"If for example, you came at four o'clock
in the afternoon,
then at three o'clock I shall begin to be happy.
I shall feel happier and happier
as the hour advances.
At four o'clock,
I shall be worrying and jumping about.
I shall show you how happy I am!
But if you come at just any time,
I shall never know at what hour
my heart is ready to greet you. . .
One must observe the proper rites. . ."

"What is a rite?" asked the little prince.

"Those also are actions too often neglected,"
said the fox.
"they are what make one day
different from other days,
one hour different from other hours.
There is a rite, for example, among my hunters.
Every Thursday they dance with the village girls.
So Thursday is a wonderful day for me!
I can take a walk as far as the vineyards.
But if the hunters danced at just any time,
every day would be like
every other day,
and I should never have any vacation at all."

So the little prince tamed the fox.
And when the hour of his departure drew near---

"Ah," said the fox, "I shall cry."

"It is your own fault," said the little prince.
"I never wished you any sort of harm;
but you wanted me to tame you. . ."

"Yes that is so", said the fox.

"But now you are going to cry!"
said the little prince.

"Yes that is so" said the fox.

"Then it has done you no good at all!"

"It has done me good," said the fox,
"because of the color of the wheat fields."
And then he added:
"go and look again at the roses.
You will understand now
that yours is unique in all the world.
Then come back to say goodbye to me,
and I will make you a present of a secret."

The little prince went away,
to look again at the roses.
"You are not at all like my rose," he said.
"As yet you are nothing.
No one has tamed you, and you have tamed no one.
You are like my fox when I first knew him.
He was only a fox
like a hundred thousand other foxes.
But I have made a friend,
and now he is unique in all the world."
And the roses were very much embarrassed.
"You are beautiful, but you are empty," he went on.
"One could not die for you.
To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think
that my rose looked just like you
--the rose that belongs to me.
But in herself alone she is more important
than all the hundreds of you
other roses: because it is she that I have watered;
because it is she
that I have put under the glass globe;
because it is for her
that I have killed the caterpillars
(except the two or three we saved
to become butterflies);
because it is she that I have listened to,
when she grumbled,
or boasted,
or even sometimes when she said nothing.
Because she is MY rose."

And he went back to meet the fox.
"Goodbye" he said.

"Goodbye," said the fox.
"And now here is my secret, a very simple secret:
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye."

"What is essential is invisible to the eye,"
the little prince repeated,
so that he would be sure to remember.

"It is the time you have wasted for your rose
that makes your rose so important.

"It is the time I have wasted for my rose--
"said the little prince
so he would be sure to remember.

"Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox.
"But you must not forget it.
You become responsible, forever,
for what you have tamed.
You are responsible for your rose. . ."

"I am responsible for my rose,"
the little prince repeated,
so that he would be sure to remember.

From the Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

for those literary lurkers...

2008-06-21T02:29:04Z

courtesy of mcsweeneys.

the "thank god for the return of the internet" link list post.

2007-10-31T00:47:38Z

in no particular order (except the wiki links) because i'm too tired...

gallery of the absurd - cartoons of celebrities with bite.

cobrasnake - l.a. party photos. found via Cory Kennedy, the underage it girl.

conan o'brien hates your homeland.

devoutdolls - homemade dolls by sara.

thisnext - addictive shopping site, type in a keyword and find lots of goodies recommended by other browsers. such as cool vinyl wall art.

etsy - handmade wonders for sale from crafters all over the world. I even found a fairy door.

cyberden - a gaming nightclub from the looks of it in Columbia. I didnt even know this place existed.

monroe and miller - short documentary on the love and marriage of arthur miller and marilyn monroe.

gum or mints - industry artists design characters based on a theme.

modish - shopping blog with amazing finds.

secret storage books - hollowed out books that serve as nifty storage places.

owl farm blog - anita, the widow of hunter s. thompson, maintains this blog that is updated fairly often.

pan folder

the library of babel.

films based on short fiction.

wild bill hagy or "why i love baldymore, hon!"

gelert must read touching doggy story.

seattle pictures

2007-10-12T19:59:07Z

the freemont troll.

view from queen anne.

mountain view from a park i cant remember.

another view.

looking up the beach.

the beach again.

duckies at the park.

china's Olympic mascots on the ave.

tacoma.

tacoma boats.

lost somewhere looking for a library book sale.

where it turns out there was only about two shelves of books and I had to be escorted out because I couldn't stop laughing.

protester at the gay pride parade.

penis on roller skates what a parade! ^^

thats one butch dog.

the cutest puppy i have ever seen.

pulling away from the city on a ferry.

another view.

mt. rainier.

leaving bainbridge island.

winter reading list

2005-11-21T01:30:44Z

My favorite genre of writing is short stories, more specifically those of the American Gothic persuasion. The ones I have read are too numerous to mention but my favorites include The Rocket Man by Ray Bradbury, A Rose For Miss Emily by William Faulkner, and The Promise of America by Thomas Wolfe.

Here is the list of novels I've read, at least those I can remember. As some will notice my strong suit is American Literature of the 20th century which is my love and as anyone who has been there knows its very hard to turn attention away from true love. I do try to branch out from Sinclair, Steinbeck, Bradbury and a league of other amazing American born writers; from time to time I'll dip my toes into the classics or French literature but its hard to be gone so long from the scribes who can romanticize even the darkest parts of the land of free.

Fellowship of the Ring - JRR Tolkien
The Two Towers - JRR Tolkien
The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
Atlas Shrugged - Ayn Rand
Anthem - Ayn Rand
The Fountainhead- Ayn Rand
Lord of the Flies - William Golding
The Stand - Stephen King
Carrie - Stephen King
Misery - Stephen King
The Green Mile - Stephen King
Gerald's Game - Stephen King
The Jungle - Upton Sinclair
World's End - Upton Sinclair
Oil! - Upton Sinclair
As I Lay Dying - William Faulkner
The Vampire Chronicles (the first seven) - Anne Rice
Belinda - Anne Rice
Cry to Heaven - Anne Rice
Maniac Magee - Jerry Spinelli
Stargirl - Jerry Spinelli
The House on Mango Street - Sandra Cisneros
The secret Life of bees - Sue Monk Kidd
The Good Earth - Pearl S Buck
Practical Magic - Alice Hoffman
Hiroshima - John Hersey
The Joy Luck Club - Amy Tan
White Oleander - Janet Finch
The Metamorphosis - Franz Kafka
Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
The Scarlet Letter - Nathaniel Hawthorne
The Crucible - Arthur Miller
Death of a Salesman - Arthur Miller
The Cherry Orchard - Anton Chekov
Dandelion Wine - Ray Bradbury
Farewell Summer - Ray Bradbury
Martian Chronicles - Ray Bradbury
From the Dust Returned - Ray Bradbury
Fahrenheit 451 - Ray Bradbury
The Magician's Nephew - CS Lewis
The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe - CS lewis
The Horse and his Boy - CS Lewis
Prince Caspian - CS lewis
Alice in wonderland/Through the looking glass - Lewis Carroll
Rebeccas World - Terry Nation
The Prydain Chronicles - Lloyd Alexander
The Iron Ring - Lloyd Alexander
The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
Bridge to Terabithia - Katherine Paterson
A Lesson Before Dying - Ernest J. Gaines
Dear Mr. Henshaw - Beverly Cleary
Hatchet - Gary Paulsen
Henry and June - Anais Nin
Delta of Venus - Anais Nin
Winter of Artifice - Anais Nin
The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
Girl, Interrupted - Susanna Kaysen
Dragonlance Chronicles - Margaret Weis,Tracy Hickman
Summer Sisters - Judy Blume
Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret - Judy Blume
Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
Charlotte's Web - E.B. White
The Trumpet of the Swan - E. B. White
The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
Angela's Ashes - Frank McCourt
The Stranger - Albert Camus
The Old man and the Sea - Ernest Hemingway
The Sun Also Rises - Ernest Hemingway
James and the Giant Peach - Roald Dahl
The BFG - Roald Dahl
The Witches - Roald Dahl
Redwall - Brian Jacques
Mossflower - Brian Jacques
To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
The Amber Spyglass - Philip Pullman
The Subtle Knife - Philip Pullman
Harry potter series - J. K. Rowling
Dolls House - Henrik Ibsen
The Giver - Lois Lowry
Number the Stars - Lois Lowry
Island of the Blue Dolphins - Scott O'Dell
The winter of our Discontent - John Steinbeck
Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
The Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
East of Eden - John Steinbeck
Lady Chatterley's Lover - DH Lawrence
Sons and Lovers - DH Lawrence
Slaughter-House-5 - Kurt Vonnegut
Jitterbug Perfume - Tom Robbins
The Little Prince - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The Heart is a Lonely Hunter - Carson McCullers
Running with Scissors - Augusten Burroughs
The Power and the Glory - Graham Greene
Animal Farm - George Orwell
Dubliners - James Joyce
White Noise - Don Delillo
Americana - Don Delillo
The Informers - Bret Easton Ellis
The Naked and the Dead - Norman Mailer
The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
In Cold Blood - Truman Capote
Other Voices, Other Rooms - Truman Capote
The Best American Non Required Reading 2007 - ED. Dave Eggers
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn - Betty Smith
My Sister, My Love - Joyce Carol Oates

Also check out my bookshelf. I'm quite the bibliophile and searching antique stores is my favorite way to find books.

semi - friends only

2005-09-26T17:47:33Z

I dont really post often and when i do its usually just something interesting i found on the internet, something I need to say to multiple rl friends, a fandom rant, or silly pictures. If that wets your whistle then by all means friend me and if i find you quirky i'll add back. I'm not one of those bitches who demands comments and cuts when you dont leave them (its LJ get over yourself) cause I lurk too but I will always appreciate a good book recommendation.

if you are looking for my icon journal check out crowscongress.

sing_song_girl @ 2005-09-07T15:08:00

2005-09-07T19:11:25Z